Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson are divorcing. The world can finally return to its standard orbit.
As far as I’m concerned, Ryan Reynolds will always be the college dude in tight jeans, drinking from a beer bong in Dick.
And Scarlett Johansson is the philosophy major traipsing around Tokyo while she watches her marriage evaporate in Lost in Translation.
These twains should never have met!
As far as I’m concerned, this divorce knocks all those out-of-kilter edges and joints throughout the universe back into place. I feel better already.
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