Saturday, December 18, 2010

Congratulations Zac and Vanessa!

Congratulations to Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens for meeting that critical milestone of adulthood:  ending their first romantic relationship!

This is big!  Every high school has its long term couples.  By senior year, they’re already so “couple-y.”  They seem to have already “settled down,” with all the good and bad that entails.  Everyone else projects onto them their own feelings about adulthood.  The kids who fear never finding a partner in life envy them like hell.  The kids who fear missing out on the fun congratulate themselves for being smart enough to avoid the chains of relationship.  The teachers place bets on their kitsch-filled wedding and subsequent, drama-filled divorce.

But you know what?  Everyone has to have that first relationship.  Zac and Vanessa are just lucky that they got it out of the way without doing anything stupid.  In that, they are so much better off than Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake after Britney stupidly professed her determination to remain a virgin until marriage, then had to face the piercing stares of people forever trying to gauge the state of her virtue.

I firmly believe that you cannot fully enter adulthood without first ending a serious relationship.

So what’s next for young Zac and Vanessa?  Vanessa will date an older, more famous man for a few years, but it will never go anywhere.  Think Courtney Cox and Michael Keaton.  Zac?  Same thing.  Think Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz.  Or possibly Anne Heche and Ellen DeGeneres.

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